Women are taught from day one that men hate desperate women. This is true, but it usually results in a woman avoiding saying yes even to a guy she really wants to go out with. She doesn’t want to seem easy, and she doesn’t feel comfortable being upfront about the fact that, yes, women want sex too. A little persistence is the key to getting a woman who wants to go out with you to agree. Unfortunately, it can be hard to tell “chase me” from “I’m really not interested.” If you want to avoid being labeled a creeper, you’ll chase with care. Here are the signs that she really wants you to ask her out again, and what to do about them.

She’s Specific with Time

“She does not have time for you”

This is the biggest one out there. If you’re asking out a woman and she turns you down by saying that she’s really busy this week, this month, or this semester, then her reasons are probably genuine. If she was giving you the brush off, she’d leave her excuse nebulous and ill defined, that way, if you asked her again she could remind you that she was “busy” that day you want to go on a date, even if you haven’t said which day that is. That’s a sure sign that you should look elsewhere for the company you crave.

If she was specific about when she was busy, you have two options. If she says that she’s busy “this week,” or “until the 18th,” then just wait it out. Make a reminder in your calendar to ask her out again when that time is up, and then move on to picking up other women in the meantime. There’s no reason you should have a little bit of fun while you’re waiting. If she’s going to be busy for a long time, several months or more, tell her that’s fine. You’re not asking her for anything extreme; you know she’s got more going on in her life than one date with you. But you’re hoping she could fit that date in somehow, somewhere. Smile, and watch as she pulls out her day planner to see if she can pencil you in anywhere.

She Wants Showy Affection

“She enjoys public display of affection too much”

Some women want to live inside of romance films. There’s nothing wrong with that by itself. She might have many other wonderful qualities. But it is a pain. If you know this woman, ask yourself what any of her past boyfriends have done. If they did a lot of surprise party planning and gifts given at work, that’s what you have to do to win her attention. Try sending her a bouquet at the office and see if she decides to return your calls after all.

Just Ask Again

Things change. Plans change. Asking out a woman who turned you down six months or a year before isn’t a bad thing. If you still like her, if her circumstances have changed (or yours have), give her a call. You’re not stalking her, but you are checking in to see how she’s doing.

The key way to regulate your behavior is to ask yourself: are you acting like you have more options? Because there are always more women waiting online or in bars to meet you. If you’re acting like she’s the only woman alive, you should probably take a step back. There’s more fish in the sea.